Oh Jesus

Crucifixes submerged in jars of piss is one thing, but this takes the cake.

They knew it would be risky to exhibit a homoerotic version of Christ's Last Supper, but curators at museum of Vienna's Roman Catholic Cathedral weren't ready for a barrage of angry messages and calls to be shut down.

The source of the dispute, which Austrian media has dubbed Vienna's version of the Mohammad caricature row, is a retrospective honoring Austria's cherished artist Alfred Hrdlicka, who turned 80 earlier this year.

Yeah, but for some reason I have trouble imagining Pope Benedict calling for the death of the artist and the bombing of the museum.

"I don't see any blasphemy here," he said, gesturing at a Crucifixion picture showing a soldier simultaneously beating Jesus and holding his genitals. "People can imagine what they want to."

I don't think "beating" was the best choice of words here. As far as his liberal use of the word "imagine" goes, I don't think anyone imagined seeing a soldier fondling their dying savior, but tit-for-tit.

But the most disputed work was 'Leonardo's Last Supper, restored by Pier Paolo Pasolini' which showed cavorting Apostles sprawling over the dining table and masturbating each other.

Hrdlicka says he represented the men in this way because there are no women in the Da Vinci painting which inspired it.

Oh well now it all makes sense. Since most dinner parties around the year 32 devolved into Bacchanalian orgies, it only makes sense to have the apostles beating each other off. Jacking Peter to fist Paul, a new colloquialism.

A communist and atheist, Hrdlicka has said the Bible is the most thrilling book he has ever read and that religious imagery forms a central core to his work.

Funny how you have to get to the third page of the article to find out the artist isn't even himself a Christian.

Boehler says the angry emails he has received remind him of how some reacted to Mel Gibson's 2004 film "The Passion of The Christ". In his opinion, critics of the film's violence and physicality also missed the point.

"The Crucifixion was brutal and it would be a lie to say everything in our world is nice," he said, pointing out that Hrdlicka is an anti-war activist who has seen the effects of Nazism and violence first hand.

Brutal, yes, but erotic? Everyone acknowledges the brutality of Christ's passion, but I guess most of us looked over the verse regarding a soldier cupping Jesus' balls.

The only real substance anyone can take from this article is the disparity in reactions to this art and those to the Danish Mohammad cartoons. The religion of peace's imams respond by calling for the destruction of the newspaper which published the cartoons, whereas the crusading infidels merely ask for it to be taken down, since it is in a church museum.